Almost Spring

This blog is my first blog which is all about transforming my life from ‘we’ to ‘me’. I am 58 year old woman surviving the pain of the collapse of my 37 year marriage that occurred suddenly through no choice of my own. . . I have survived the six months to date by living in today and enjoying the moments of a glorious summer. . . . the beautiful sunrises that have beckoned me each day . . . . the views to the valley . . . . walks through the forests . . . . .listening to the birds. . . .spending time with my family. . . .

The summer is now at an end, the days are shorter, the mornings colder and winter is approaching. . . . I am beginning to wonder how I will survive the darkness, the cold, the grey skies and the impending gloom of winter. Then I thought to myself – ‘why?’ It is almost spring. With spring comes hope, the birth of new flowers, warm days again and blue, blue skies. Winter is simply the path one needs to take to get there.

So too with my current life situation. What would I achieve by wallowing in the depths of a winter of loneliness and despair? What would be the point of sitting here mourning the loss of the supposed sunny happy-ever-after ‘we’ that is gone? Instead I can choose to move forward towards a bright new future as ‘me’.  I resolved that today would be the start of my transformation, my 40 steps from ‘we’ to ‘me’, one step for each year of our time together. I do not know how long each step will take and I do not know what the steps will be but I do know that I will get there. I want to keep my own core beliefs, hold onto my dreams and not let what somebody else chose to do drag me down as a person. At the moment it may be winter; it may be cold, dark, and despairing; and yet I can see that it is almost spring.