Week 7 –
I have set up a little desk in the living room where I write or do some ‘soul-searching’ or things on the computer or I read. Usually I put the TV or a movie on with the sound turned down low. The voices keep me company but I rarely watch what is on – so absorbed I am at the moment with the thoughts in my head. I do other things with my time. I am regaining my soul that I did not even know I had lost – so immersed I was in my husband and my children and the life of ‘us’ throughout our marriage.
It is the little things that are now changing that I never realised I had lost. The big things stand out – looking after the children – looking after him – but the little things have gone unnoticed. Reading, writing, and quiet times; MY photos that have been kept in drawers that I can now put on display; MY hobbies stashed away in cupboards that can now be retrieved; MY weekends to now do with whatever I wanted …. visiting my family…….walking ……… writing ………. doing lots of things ….. or just a few things …….MY choice.
It is the little things that have been given up that are slowly coming back, so that I am gradually learning who the real me actually was and the real me that actually is.