Week 10 – If it is to be, it is up to me

Week 10. I have been trying to think of what I want to do with my life.

I thought of all my ‘doing’ things in the past – looking after the children, caring for my husband, cooking, cleaning, preparing for holidays, taking holidays, involving myself in the children’s activities. All these things were actually part of my ‘being’ a wife and mother. Even running the business was part of providing the finances to feed and educate the children, of providing a secure financially independent retirement for ‘us’ as a couple. Now that my role of ‘wife’ had gone, now the children have grown, now there is no longer ‘us’; do I want to keep doing all these same things? Have they lost their meaning? What am I to do now? What do I want to do?

It suddenly struck me that instead of focusing on all my ‘doing’ things from the past; or trying to find things to ‘do’ in the future, perhaps I should focus on what I wanted to ‘be’.

I decided I needed in the first instance to work on myself, to become strong again, to regain my self-esteem and confidence. Then, when I reached that point, I could continue on a path forward by setting some goals of things to strive for, of things to do. So while I understood and had already resolved that it was up to me to take responsibility to act (‘to do’); underlying that principle was the reason for the actions; the essence of my being of what I wanted to be inside (‘to be’).

I needed to start at the beginning, and the beginning was me and what I wanted to be. I wrote down my main aims for myself as to what I wanted to be and these were –

  • Self-fulfilled with a feeling of high self-esteem, self-worth and a true self-identity
  • Passionate and optimistic in everything I choose do
  • Courageous and determined when faced with life’s difficulties
  • Dependable and reliable to my friends and family
  • Calm and caring; providing a home of joy, relaxation, peace and comfort
  • An inspirational leader providing an atmosphere of trust, tolerance and co-operation
  • A person with an inner core of personal strength by developing a framework of values and principles to live by.

I resolved on this day that I alone will be responsible for developing that framework of principles and upholding my values and I alone would empower myself to act on those principles and achieve my aims. I truly would become “the master of my fate, the captain of my soul” (William Henley)


Quote by William H Johnson (I think)

9 thoughts on “Week 10 – If it is to be, it is up to me

    • Thanks for the award nomination. I am most humbled. I will post the award on my blog as soon as I am able. It may take me a few days to work out how to do the links etc. I am enjoying your blogs and find your posts inspirational. Keep writing, you do it well.

    • Thanks ever so much for the award. I will reply to the award nomination on my blog as soon as I can. It may take me a few days to work out how to do all the links etc. I am enjoying your blog. It is inspirational. Keep up with your writing. You do it well.

  1. Hi Elizabeth. I admire your writing and photography, and wish to confirm the opinions of the others who nominated you for the awards. You deserve them. However, by no means do I envy you for all the time you’re going to spend living up to the awards. It’s going to take me forever to reply to my one nomination — it’s given me writers block. Good work in your posting, and good luck in your nominations; 🙂

    • Thanks for the comment. I enjoy your posts, they brighten my day. I like the whales. They remind me of a trip I had to Alaska with my son a year ago. If you have received an award, you deserve it. Your photographs are fantastic. Thanks for stopping by.

  2. Pingback: My ‘turning sixty’ resolution … to live by my core values. | Almost Spring

  3. Pingback: My life in transition # 3 – Resistance | Almost Spring

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