Love under a rainbow




My second son was married two weeks ago. It was a glorious affair over six days on the Cook Islands.  It was the coming together of our family and my new daughter-in-law’s family and all of the couple’s friends. It was the coming together of my family and my ex-husband’s family for the first time since our separation. It was the first major milestone that we had faced since that separation.

It was not without an undercurrent of fear (on my part) in meeting up with my ex-husband in these circumstances and wondering how to react with him. However, it was time to put all that aside and make it a happy occasion for my son and his wife to be.

Prior to the wedding, we had managed to arrange a family get together with the happy couple in Sydney for my mother and my two nephews and families who could not make it to the wedding. We were able to bring together for the first time my mother’s six little great-grand-daughters, including my two grand-daughters, all under five. They looked so cute together. It was a happy day. Due to some wonderful friends, we were also able to arrange care for my mother for a few days so that my sister could also attend the wedding, albeit she would only attend for two nights.

Once on the island, I was able to relax and I had a wonderful time. I shared a villa with two of my children, my sister (on the two nights she came), my brother-in-law, and my niece. My brother and his family were in the villa next to us. We were able to have some close family gatherings and chats long into the night. It was a wonderful time of togetherness.

I even did some kayaking and had a pedicure 🙂

The wedding ceremony itself on the fifth day was beautiful and many tears of joy and happiness were shed, along with some nostalgic tears, and some sad tears that my son would now reside in Canada – so far away.

Then it came to the reception and speeches.

When I turned sixty earlier this year, I gave a little speech about my life being like a tree. I described the roots of the tree as my ancestral and extended family; the trunk of the tree as representing my friends, acquaintances, education, talents and experiences; and the branches of the trees my children and grand-children. I had described how my tree was spreading the seeds of the values inherited from my family, and those I had formed myself.

When it came to my turn for giving a speech, I had thought I would use the same imagery of the tree. However, I could not see where my son and new daughter-in-law would fit. Would she become part of my tree? Would my son become part of her tree? Would they start growing their own tree?

Then, instead of a tree, I thought of the imagery of a rainbow.

A rainbow represents harmony. To me, having the wedding in such a setting with all of us coming together to help celebrate, was like a rainbow. It was the promise of new beginnings, after the storm. The arches of the rainbow represented the joining together of my son’s family and my new daughter-in-law’s family. Each colour of each arch of the rainbow represented each parent and grandparent and their families, and we were joined together in harmony by the union of my son and his new wife. This was the promise to them of the rainbow and its message of hope. Within that rainbow, there were the gifts that had been given to them by all the generations that went before them.

Red for passion and excitement.
Orange for vitality and good health.
Yellow for the promise of new beginnings.
Green for compassion and kindness, and for this great earth.
Blue for the courage to speak up for their beliefs.
Indigo for love and companionship.
Violet for peace, temperance and wisdom..
The full rainbow for embracing love in harmony.

That was my message to them for their wedding.

And this (by sheer coincidence) was their wedding song.



Image courtesy[Tao55]/



32 thoughts on “Love under a rainbow

  1. what a beautiful honouring of the bride and groom, of your own precious self, and of the journey of life. So beautifully done. As one woman to another, I just want to say how proud I am of you.

  2. This is a beautiful story Elizabeth.
    The wedding sounds gorgeous and your speech is very special and meaningful. I’m so glad it went well for you and that you opened your heart to everyone!

  3. In the highs and lows of life, embrace these moments of beauty and grace. They are for heart warming memories and reminders for living fully coming from an open heart full of love 🙂
    Val x

    • You offer such words of wisdom and fill me with much courage and determination to do all that I can be and do, in the very best way I can at the time and be proud of that, even if achievements seem small and slow. Thanks

      • This is all any one of us can ask of ourselves Elizabeth. We can never know the impact we have, but we know when we do our best coming from our authentic self.
        Val x

  4. Love it! I am from Hawai’i, where rainbows are frequent, and Izrael Kamakawiwoole lived and created his music. Your imagery and connections were beautiful!

    • I love the song and this rendition is SO beautiful. I will never hear it again without thinking of the wonderful time we had.
      It was a pity that Izrael K passed on so young. His voice was so melodious.

    • Thanks for stopping by and your words of praise to me. I really appreciate it. There is a lot going on at the moment and I have had to reduce blogging time. I will catch up with your posts when things settle down.

  5. I am so pleased for you that you were able to enjoy the occasion without any serious negative concerns regarding your ex. We have also had two weddings in the family (my granddaughters) since our divorce, and managed to remain civil to each other :-D. I love both your images – tree and rainbow – and find it especially apt on this occasion. May they have a long and happy married life together.

    • I would not say that there was not any serious concerns. It was just that they faded away into the background (with my mother’s health issues impacting us all in the weeks before the wedding). Nevertheless, we were able to be civil to each other, even though I was dying inside (whenever i was in his presence).
      The wedding was a happy occasion and uplifted me that good times are ahead. thanks for stopping by.

  6. Gorgeous imagery shown in your special speech about love under a rainbow. I am so excited you went to Cook Islands, kayaked, got a pedicure, (well I have never had one so am thinking about it…) and the wedding going smoothly and happily ever after for your son and his wife. Hope if there were awkward moments with your ex, they were few and far between! Smiles and hugs, You did it, Elizabeth!!

    • Just letting you know I was thinking about your image of the tree, felt it was also a beautiful message that could be shared at an anniversary of your son and his wife… Smiles!

    • Yes, there were a few awkward moments but I was able to put them aside. It was a wonderful wedding and I felt the future opening up to good times ahead.
      I have largely been off-line as there is so much going on and I will catch up with your posts during the weeks ahead.

      • No rush, as you know, I fly by the ‘seat of my pants,’ depending on length of my days and library hours! I am glad you had overall a wonderful wedding experience. It may not ever be totally comfortable but it will ease the pain, knowing that your children understand and will help bridge things and help you, too. We sometimes forget how grown up they are. I remember your talking to your son, in trepidation, how strongly he gave you support and encouragement… You raised great children, you will be there for them, as I see they will be for you! Hugs, Robin

  7. The Cook Islands – what a beautiful place to have a family get -together for a wedding. I am so glad for you that you could enjoy all this.
    The rainbow – such a wonderful idea for your speech.

  8. Pingback: Wedding wobbles after divorce | Almost Spring

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